


Happy Christmas

by lilactreesinwinter



Series: The Heart Wants What It Wants [3]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: 2009 Phan, Christmas, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2016-12-20
Packaged: 2018-09-09 22:48:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8916157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilactreesinwinter/pseuds/lilactreesinwinter
Summary: It’s Christmas Eve 2009. Phil has had an amazing year, and the best part of it is sleeping on the sofa next to him.





	

Phil came into the lounge at his parents’ house to find Dan asleep on the sofa. He was sprawled on his stomach as was his wont, his arms cradling a cushion under his head. He looked like an adorable little boy lying like that. He was also the man that Phil was deeply in love with.

Phil tiptoed across the carpet and carefully sat himself in the space left between Dan and the sofa arm. Dan murmured and burrowed his face into the cushion. Phil stroked his hand over Dan’s hair and down his back, watching with satisfaction as his boyfriend subsided back into sleep. His boyfriend. He could not have imagined at the beginning of the year that he would be sat here on the morning of Christmas Eve with his arm around someone that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He could not have imagined being so happy.

A year ago, he had been doing his master’s degree at uni, hanging out with friends, and spending time on his videos and YouTube career. He had been working hard and having fun. He had also been feeling increasingly lonely. He had turned 22 without ever having had a longterm relationship, while everyone else his age seemed to be pairing up and settling down.

Having been on YouTube for years, Phil had long accepted fangirls and fanboys as part of the package. The feedback and admiration were mostly a fun reward for the effort of making videos and maintaining an online presence, and Phil had made friends with a few of his fans. Last summer, one fan in particular had caught his eye. This fan was very attentive and unfailingly admiring—almost to the point of being stalkerish, but somehow this fan’s sincerity came through. So Phil began responding to his tweets, and soon they were corresponding regularly. They liked many of the same bands and video games; they never seemed to run out of things to talk about and the banter came easily. Moreover, this fan—Dan, of course—was serious about making videos himself, and genuinely interested in what Phil could teach him. A strong friendship was growing, which was nice.

Eventually, it made sense to move beyond the limitations of a keyboard and set up a call on Skype. The first time Dan appeared on his monitor, Phil nearly lost his composure. He had seen some thumbnails, and some slightly blurry snapshots online, but nothing that compared to the vision that appeared before him. Long-fringed emo hair, deep dark eyes like wells to fall into, and a brilliant mischievous smile that lit up Dan’s whole face when he saw Phil. Phil realised then that Dan could mean more to him than as just a friend.

Phil had always been a person who had played his cards close to his chest and kept his feelings to himself. He didn’t want to spoil things with Dan—as they spent ever more time online together—by sharing his ever growing interest in him. They had already started playing the public flirting game, for the entertainment of their followers and themselves, and they continued, more often than not coordinating their postings and responses. Phil found the public flirtation perfect cover for saying things he really meant. Thus no one thought it remarkable when he spoke from the heart in his comment on Dan’s first Dailybooth: “stop being so damn pretty dan howell”.

The first time they met in person was magical. Phil could hardly contain his excitement as he met Dan at the train. As he wrapped his arms around him in a hug, Phil realised Dan was even taller than he was—and felt warm and comfortable in his arms, and smelled wonderful, and looked amazing up close….. Phil took Dan to his favourite haunts in Manchester, and then up in the big Wheel. As they rose into the air, Phil wanted to take Dan into his arms again, and bury his face into his neck, and kiss him all over. But he was nervous and not sure of what Dan would want. His desire to hold him manifested in clawing at him, and his desire to kiss him manifested in biting into the air next to him. Suddenly, to his surprise, Dan turned his head and kissed him full on the mouth. Phil’s stomach flipped over and he stopped breathing—Dan must like him that way too! But instead, Dan looked confused and pulled back and apologised. Apologised!

Phil was disappointed that Dan wanted to keep a distance between them. But he knew that he was going to stay as close to Dan as he would allow him, for as long as he would allow him. He would be like a cat who would sit quietly by you without your really noticing. And, like a cat, Phil took the tactic of gently crossing that distance on occasion, and bumping into Dan. He would be softly rebuffed; he would wait awhile and try again.

So they saw each other a lot and Phil continued his cat-like forays into Dan’s space. They grew closer and closer. They played video games and watched films and made videos and cuddled on the sofa and spooned in bed at night. Sometimes Dan would touch him or surprise him with a kiss, and then re-establish the distance between them.

Then came one night, very late, after an amazing day together, and after Dan sent out suggestive tweets about Uma Thurman watching him have sex. Phil crossed the distance to Dan once more and this time he held on. And Dan held him back. And they made love and it was wonderful. And since then there was no distance between them and….Phil had a boyfriend, who he loved and who he knew loved him too.

Phil would have to wake Dan up soon so he could get him to the train back home to his family. Dan had come to spend the days just before Christmas with Phil. They had worked together on an massive interactive video starring Lion and Lioness, and an evil Santa Bear played by Dan. Phil had been excited that it had snowed: it made the video really special and Christmassy. It was so cold, but he and Dan had spent a lot of time out in the snow, filming and playing and chasing each other—and sometimes catching each other and holding on tight. They had taken a walk just as it was getting dark, and Dan had lain down in the snow. (To look at the stars? Or maybe just to have Phil lie down with him.) It was freezing there on the icy ground, but Dan was so warm in his arms and his face was so soft and open as he looked at Phil, and let himself be kissed. Phil reached out and wrote “I love Dan” in the snow.

Phil was thinking of that moment as he slowly caressed Dan’s back. Suddenly the lounge door popped open, revealing Phil’s mother. Phil started up and moved his hand. But he found that instead of letting go of Dan, he had wrapped his arm closer around him. He looked at his mother in some consternation. But his mum just cocked her head and smiled at him.

“I’m so glad, Phil, that you have found someone to love,” she said softly. “You are very lucky—I’ve seen how that boy adores you. I don’t think he gives his heart lightly, but when he does, it’s forever. If you keep loving him, I think he will always love you back. Happy Christmas, Phil. I know you already have the best present you could have.”

She fluttered her fingers and closed the door, leaving Phil to ponder his mum’s words. He hadn’t thought anyone knew about his feelings about Dan, but of course his mother saw everything—he shouldn’t have been surprised.

He looked down at the boy tucked under his arm, and watched a dimple slowly form in his cheek. Phil swirled his finger into that dimple as Dan smiled. “Happy Christmas, Phil,” said the best present Phil could ever have.


End file.
